Sexual Health Addiction

Press Release

When He’s Married to Mom  |  Contents


March 13, 2007

Contact Name: Shida Carr; 212.698.4384 

How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment
with Alexander P. Morgan

“He offers compassionate guidance for healing and for building healthy relationships.”
-Library Journal

“Dr. Ken Adams has done it again. This book on mother-son enmeshment explains not only this too-little understood developmental block, but points the way to liberation. The absense of psycho-babble makes it clear reading for victims and their clinicians”
-John Franklin, Ph.D., Distinguished Professor of Counseling and Addiction Studies, University of Detroit Mercy

“In When He’s Married to Mom, Adams…offers incisive advice about how to develop appropriate boundaries with overly close mothers. Equally important, he helps women who love these men either to develop warm and nurturing relationships or to understand when a man is too locked into enmeshment to be emotionally available”.
-Richard B. Gartner, Ph.D, Author, Beyond Betrayal and Betrayed as Boys

Many women wonder why the men they love have difficulty committing to a serious relationship. Why do men compulsively womanize, refuse to give up sex addictions, or become alcoholics? Why do some continuously jeopardize love and happiness in their intimate relationships? Dr. Kenneth M. Adams, Ph.D. sheds light on these questions and more in his new book, WHEN HE’S MARRIED TO MOM: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment (Fireside Books/Simon & Schuster Trade Paperback, March 13, 2007; 0-7432-9138-7; $14.00).

According to Dr. Adams, one in ten men in America has excessive emotional ties to their mothers. Referred to as mother-son enmeshment, this potentially damaging relationship occurs when sons serve as surrogate husbands for their lonely and neglected mothers who rely on their sons for closeness and emotional support. It can create major issues for these mother-enmeshed men (MEMS)—commitment phobia, guilt, feelings of inadequacy, and low self-worth, to name just a few—which, in turn, can lead to ambivalence and indecision in adult relationships.

In the first half of the book, Dr. Adams uses real-life case studies drawn from twenty-five years of clinical practice to outline the MEM character profile and illustrate how mothers can inadvertently damage their sons in childhood. With scientific breakthroughs over the past fifteen years, including new clinical studies and treatment options WHEN HE’S MARRIED TO MOM informs people in similar situations that they are not facing a uniquely frustrating situation—there are many people out there with the same difficulties.

After illustrating how mother-son enmeshment manifests itself in adult men, Dr. Adams offers thoughtful and practical advice to everyone affected by this complicated relationship—from the troubled men themselves, to the women in love with them, and to the mothers who wish to avoid the same fate for their sons. He addresses recovery/healing, self-understanding and how to create healthy relationships in the following chapters:


  • Becoming Aware: Uncover the workings of the unconscious mind to gain control over destructive behaviors
  • Being Your Own Man: MEMS need to develop their relationships with their father and set boundaries with their mothers.
  • Divorce Mom and Don’t Marry Someone Like Her: Offers advice on creating a Relationship Plan for long-lasting romantic relationships.
  • Should I stay Or Should I Go?: Addresses the needs of partners of MEMs and advises them to take action to move a relationship forward.
  • Parenting Is A Spiritual Mission: Makes suggestions for mothers and fathers who want to avoid the enmeshment trap for their own son.

WHEN HE’S MARRIED TO MOM includes questionnaires, diagrams, and checklist offering an engaging, understandable, and useful examination of a common unhealthy family dynamic that helps lift the cloak of invisisbility that often shrouds men’s needs and does so in an accessible, compassionate way.WHEN HE’S MARRIEDTO MOMis an informative, compassionate introduction to mother-son enmeshment, an unhealthy relationship often difficult to recognize yet extremely important to understand.

About the Author:

Kenneth M. Adams, PH.D., is a licensed psychologist and internationally recognized expert in treating trauma-induced intimacy disorders. Dr. Adams is the author of Silently Seduced. He lives with his family in Rochester Hills, Michigan.

Alexander P. Morgan is a writer specializing in technical subjects. A National Science Foundation Fellow and winner of the American Society of Mechanical Engineers’ Melville Medal. He lives in Birmingham, Michigan

WHEN HE’S MARRIED TO MOM: How to Help Mother-Enmeshed Men Open Their Hearts to True Love and Commitment
by Kenneth M. Adams, Ph.D. with Alexander P. Morgan
Fireside Books/Simon & Schuster Trade Paperback: On-Sale: March 13, 2007; 0-7432-9138-7

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