How To Choose The Best Therapist

How To Choose The Best Therapist or Decide If The One You Are Seeing Is Right For You

Deciding on who is the best fit for you in choosing a therapist is an important decision. Besides being licensed with the state at either a Masters or Doctorate level, the following criteria may help with deciding if the therapist you are seeing is right for you. Having three to six sessions is a reasonable time to determine if the fit is right for you.

The therapist should:

  • Have the ability to listen and be empathic toward your concerns.
  • Have the ability to be able to lead you to insights and solutions that go beyond what a friend or clergy member would advise.
  • Be able to help you feel hopeful and empowered to manage your challenges.
  • Have the ability to challenge you, when needed, in a way that invites rather than shames you into breaking through denying and rationalizing problems.
  • Be able to collaborate with other professionals when additional expertise is needed.
  • Be willing to refer you to another professional if the therapeutic relationship is not helping you.

If you are seeking help for sex addiction related problems or difficulties due to being impacted by sex addiction, then the criteria should be even more specific.

Consider taking these questions to the therapist:

  1. What is your belief about sex and porn addiction problems?
  2. How will your position determine the way in which you would diagnosis and treat my problem?
  3.  What are the criteria you would use to determine if I am a sex or porn addict?
  4. What is your specific training to treat sex and porn addiction?
  5. If you don’t feel I have a sex or porn addiction, or don’t believe in that diagnosis, will you refer me to someone who is trained in sex and porn addiction therapy if your approach fails to help me?
  6. If you are trained to treat sex and porn addiction, how can I be certain that you won’t label and treat me as an addict if I am not one?
  7. What is your approach to treating the couple when one partner is in distress over the other’s compulsive sexual behavior?
  8. What is your treatment approach to handling sexual secrets that violate the implicit or explicit understanding regarding trust within a relationship?
  9. What results can I expect by participating with your approach to treatment?
  10. What is a reasonable time frame that I should expect to see change?

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